From Marketing to Milk features on my blog roll and is one of my favorites. Milks' writing is funny, witty and clever, and always inspires thought and opinion.
It is a tough time for her right now, the darkest of times. Her mother has recently been diagnosed with advanced lung cancer and the prognosis is not good.
I too have experienced the pain cancer can bring but never managed to verbalize my feelings this well.
Milk has asked me to publish this post for her as she needs to write, needs to put the words out there.
I happen to think the words are beautiful because they are so raw and so honest.
Angry that the grandparents my children will know, grow up with, remember, won't be MY parents. That the one they will call Grandma won't be MY mum, the one they will know as Grandad will be someone else's.
I'm angry that my Mum will be a hazy recollection, snapshots - splintered and one-dimensional - just as my Dad is now only a photo on the fridge. Their absence juxtaposed against a life filled with love and cuddles and memories from their other, "real" grandparents.
I'm angry that it won't be my mum that picks them up from school, that wraps her arms around them and asks them what their day was like. That she'll never see the expression on their faces as they unwrap her carefully chosen Christmas present, or heap praise on them when they read their first words.
I'm angry that I will have to live more of my life without her than I have done with. One of the most important people to me - my mother, my best friend - here for just a fraction of my life. Killed off after only the first few chapters.
I'm angry that the person that has been at the centre of my universe for 33 years will be snatched away from me, cruelly, suddenly, and that I will have to relearn to live my life without her.
I'm angry that at just 33 I will be an orphan.
I'm angry that my "go to person", my reference point for all the decisions I make, the person at the end of the telephone when I'm feeling unsteady or unsure, will become unavailable. Permanently engaged.
I'm angry that I will have to make sense of all of this by myself.
I'm really fucking angry, and my rage is selfish and personal. For now it's all about me.
Please visit From Marketing to Milk and show some much needed support to this lovely lady.